Je t'aime moi non plus (english version)
by Jobastre
Summary: Silence was invading the locker room for what seemed like hours. None both women dared to break it. After S5x11.


_**Hi everybody. I decided to translate my french OS about Holly & Gail. I hope you will forgive me my mistakes. Enjoy this story and please post your reviews. :P**_

Silence was invading the locker room for what seemed like hours. None both women dared to break it. Each trying to digest what the other had just told. Gail slowly turned to the woman sitting beside her on the bench. Holly was deep in her thoughts and was startled when she heard the Gail's voice.

-Huh… What?

-I ask you, since how long were you thinking about leaving Canada?

The tone was sad and Holly knew that the blonde was trying to hold tears back that threatened to fall over her face.

-I… I don't know. I've had this opportunity and it seemed to be an excellent idea for me, for us, Holly answered avoiding to look at the officer.

-For us?

-I thought that starting from scratch, somewhere else, could give a better chance for our relationship.

Gail sighed with a little laugh. Would she have followed Holly if she didn't have Sophie in her life now? She didn't even know how answering to this question.

-And you?

-What me?

-Mom…

-Sophie and I… we are found each other in a moment where our lives didn't seem to have real sense anymore. I love this kid. If you only could…

Gail didn't end her sentence. Why Holly would want to know Sophie? She left in two weeks.

-I would like to know her, Holly suddenly says.

-Wh… Why? I mean… you leave soon… Gail says in a sad voice.

-I… I just want to know the person who will take care of you when I won't be there anymore, Holly whispered.

Gail looked up and stared Holly's eyes. The tears fell quietly on the brunette's cheeks. Gail reached out to wipe them softly from Holly's face.

-I all screwed up, didn't I?

-You're not the only one, Holly says by putting her hand on Gail's. I should have come to see you when you didn't answer my messages and insisted us to talk each other.

A new silence between both women was while they stared each other.

-Then… it's over. .

It was more an affirmation than a question from Gail, but she hoped a positive issue in a situation that seems lost.

-Maybe not…

-What do you mean? You… you would stay if I asked you?

-I wish… so much… to say yes…

-But…

-But I already signed my contract and they expect me in two weeks to start the new research protocol.

-It is what I said… All is over.

Holly took the Gail's hands in hers.

-What do you think about distance relationships?

-Holly… you will be more than 2000 km from here. We'll see each other… what… twice per year! Because to be honest my salary as cop doesn't give me money enough to buy tickets plane at 800$ each week.

-But from my side before accepting this job I negociated a good salary to buy some tickets plane. I… I don't want to lose you again. Not now, after we are found back each other.

-Neither do I, Holly… but distance relationships…

-We could try?

-Is it you who says that? Gail answers with laugh.

-Why are you laughing?

-I remind you that you have replaced me in your bed pretty fast after our non-break up, seen I didn't really know that we broke up. For me, we… forget it!

-Gail, I…

Her mouth was shut by two fingers on her lips.

-Sshhh… It's OK! I'm not mad at you, Gail says with a wide smile which comforted Holly. Then, slowly, she slid her hand behind the brunette's neck, pulled her against her and pressed her lips on hers, in a kiss which said all the love she had for this woman who had made her so happy for weeks they had shared.

-If it's your way to break up with me, I want to break up with you all the time, Holly says when they parted to catch their breath.

-This is my way to say I love you..

-Gail…

-You're not obliged to say in return and it is not a way to ask you to stay. I… I just needed to say it.

Time seemed to be off in this room which was become their refuge for several minutes. All that mattered was the present time. In the arms of each other, they didn't want to break this moment that only belonged to them.

-We should go out from here Gail whispered in Holly's ear.

The driving until Holly's was quiet. When they were inside, Holly took the Gail's hand and led her towards stairs to the second floor where her bedroom was. However Holly felt some resistance.

-Holly… I don't think it is a good idea, Gail says with a sad voice.

-Please Gail, the brunette begged. I need of that, I need to feel you, I need to know that what there is between us is true and…

- For what? What matter if what I feel for you is true. It's already hard enough to know that I've lost you again. Spending the night to make love you after spending all these last weeks without you and knowing that tomorrow you won't be here anymore… Sobs prevented her to finish her sentence.

Holly embraced the blonde. The both women let free their tears that flooded their cheeks.

-I'm sorry Gail, Holly whispered. It was a selfish request. But… I missed you so much. I can't believe that our story is over before beginning.

Gail took Holly's face between her hands to look at her eyes. Softly she put her lips on hers. Soon, the kiss deepened, the tongues mingled in a delightful ballet that was only interrupted by lack of oxygen.

-If you knew like I missed you too, and how I will miss you. You brought me so much Holly. If only I could back in time and…

This time it was Holly who kissed first. Soon, the brunette felt Gail's hands snuck under her tee-shirt, and she began to tremble with pleasure as she felt the caress from the blonde on her skin.

-Gail… Gail… you should st…

Her sentence ended in the blonde's mouth, while Gail kissed her lips again. Finally in a great effort, Holly managed to stop her impetuous officer.

-Gail… I don't want you to do something that you'll regret later. And mainly, I don't want to hurt you more than I already did

-I want you Holly… I want to love you even if it's the last time. The only thing that I will regret, will be to have letting my fear to push you away from me for weeks. All that I want right now is to enjoy this night to be with you, to be yours.

As few moments earlier, Holly took Gail's hand and led her towards her bedroom, but this time there was not resistance.

XXX

Holly was the first to wake up. She stared the blonde who slept deeply beside her. How could she let Gail behind her? She loved this woman so much, even if she had not dared to say her because of her fear to hurt her more or to protect herself. If only…

-You know that it is not polite to stare people when they're sleeping.

-Hey!

-Hey! Gail's face was bright.

« She is so beautiful » Holly thought..

-Marry me! The words were out without she might stop them.

-Wh… what? Gail sat on the bed, completely awaken.

-Do you want to marry me?

-Holly… you can't…

-I love you Gail… I never loved someone like I love you. I don't want to lose you.

-I love you too, but…

-Then, marry me!

-I remind you that you leave in two weeks! Gail answered more dryly that she wanted.

-Exactly… I want us to marry before my departure.

-But… Holly… It's totally insane!

-Gail… do you love me… I mean really?

-You know the answer.

-I want to hear it from you.

-I already said and repeated all the night. I love you Holly.

-So … say yes!

-In what a piece of paper and a ring will change things? You will leave in two weeks anyway!

Holly looked at Gail and smiled.

-Why do you smile?

-You don't say NO!

-I don't say YES! Holly is…

-Crazy… I know but our story is crazy from the beginning! I love you, and to know that the woman that I love, my wife is waiting for me in Toronto with our daughter…

-You… you want Sophie in your life?

-If she is in yours, of course, she will be in mine, in ours!

-Holly… anyway we won't be able to find someone to marry us in so little time.

Holly jumped into Gail's arms and kissed her impetuously.

-So it's YES!

-I don't still say that! I've a question… how will you do without… what we did all the night?

-Don't worry about that, I can live without sex Gail… except when you're around, Holly teased.

-Do I have to remind you what happened during our break up?

-I tried to forget you Gail! The brunette answered lightly upset. Holly took Gail's face into her hands for they might look at each other.

-Gail I love you. Don't ever doubt about that. My request is maybe selfish but it is true. I really want you to be my wife.

-Holly… you leave to live in San Francisco. Married or not how do you want that it works

-Because I do want it, because I need to know that you are in my life and you will be there… at home… each time I'll be back. Is it wh… I want to know if you, you want it too, if you're ready to fight for me, for us.

Gail put her hands on Holly's and stared brown eyes.

-I love you.

-Me too sweetie.

-You should better to begin to search right now a beautiful ring if you want a definitive YES! Gail says with a wide smile.

Holly jumped on Gail's lips, deepening the kiss until the blonde gives her a complete access to her mouth. Hands became increasingly wandering, caressing the bodies of the two women.

-You should… maybe… go out… to buy my … oh God, Holly!

-Don't worry about the ring. All that I want right away it is to tattoo your body on mine. I want to know each inch from your skin… Holly says by reaching the Gail's intimacy. I want that the smell from my wife be on me forever.


End file.
